Impersonal revealings

The tendency to hide what one is doing, thinking, developing, investing their time and life force into.. does it come from a desire to be nothing more or less than humble? Is it simply within this rather impersonal cultural experience that we choose not to burden or excite each other with our sincere feelings of being? Does it take extenuating circumstances to bring about mutual uncensored communications? how could it be so hard to validate the expressions of those around us? We can judge individuals and art with the weight of every age now but often fail to empathize with human reactions to this very present time. Is it because of our latent relationship with our own expression? I percieve that we spend so much of our time failing to reveal ourselves to each other.. at the same time resenting the burden of a personal experience unwitnessed.. trying to justify the pain that we hold onto by sharing our experiences in the hopes that something has been processed that will be allowed to lay to rest.. to be let go of.. not simply in the singular, for a brief moment of personal relief, or for the shadow of a ghost, but in the largest sense imaginable. to give meaning to our carrying and holding being as one lonely disconnected soul among so many experiences in time and space. cultural catharsis giving birth to change. opposing forces eventually coming to rest in the integration of multiple necessary truths.. one moving picture relying on different frames that cannot know each other at once, to bring about the next full feature. belief without the full knowledge of why and why not, waiting for us to bring ourselves to a more accurate or authentic place, through and hopefully with the movements of time. an intuition followed by the gap between what has been and could be. it is not yet the age of aquarius.

If as individuals within this culture we choose to ignore others in order to fully explore our own personal truths.. then we must at least (at least!) allow for a manifold and 3 dimensional experience of ourselves. turning a blind eye upon others while failing to see ourselves will cause us to disappear as an entire collective experience/expression of meaning. do we not sometimes feel as if we may have forgotten ourselves? left behind at some juncture where it couldn't seem to fit through the crack in the cubicle? do we believe in our experiences of others or feel as if ghosts among the dead? are people bearing pieces of ourselves for us that we couldn't contain within the complex of our personal identities but that we somehow know intrinsically and deeply within us as potential for our spirit? do we look away or continue to stare and see nothing..? I feel like the awareness of these questions should be fairly constant throughout our experiences and yet I find myself waking up just every once and a while only through the help of memories and objects containing history..

Pisces is the most inward of all characters. Creating massive worlds within itself that play simultaneously alongside its actual outward experiences, which come into conjunction with its dreamlike awareness at regular and sometimes surprising intervals. it can be as if the events and meanings that are coming from outside are so different from how the inner world has formed, that the authenticity of how that person has been and will be relating comes into question. This can seem threatening, but what's worse than an unconscious killer? Murdering truth without even knowing it? Someone inflicting pain and reflecting inauthenticity without acknowledging the effects.. meanwhile putting everyone else and their truth into question (or out of validation as real/authentic) simply by the mere unrelated or disconnected nature of their being. Usually I would choose to ignore a person like this, but if we are within the movement of Pisces is this affect and tendency within us all now? Does this kind of phenomenon (breaks in communication and processing) stop the movement of truth through time and history? Is it like a forest fire in the collective unconscious that will eventually relieve us of our 'post-post-modern predicament'? Or will we remain in this seemingly vacuous space in history? Does this Piscean trait not relate to the age and culture that we inhabit right now? This gap must be a space for reflection. Otherwise I cannot seem to justify the time.

The other main trait of Pisces is a tendency to completely emotionally absorb or fully become part of things that most of us usually consider to be outside of the self. (thus seperating us from them) This zen-like attribute is the only way to retrieve and feel those inner states of being that in previous times were informed through the senses of natural experiences - and passed down through living culture; mythology; storytelling; historical objects; art. Half of that cultural/being-related information having been stored in the objects of cultural learning that can inspire those states (storytellers, actors, teachers, architecture, books, paintings etc.) and half in the simple fact that on the recieving end people were actually absorbing what was still left to pass down. That window in time is always closing and history moves (or begins to stagnate) when the window closes before anyone has absorbed the gift and the power to give it. I believe that this talent has generally been and is being lost. Perhaps within the Piscean element one can take on the dynamic of an entire history and simply validate its having been through pure experience. Sometimes this allows things to pass and opens up room for change, which is the possibility for potentials. But that clearing demands that we consider the serious weight of the freedom that it gives. This includes the ability to draw upon an entire legacy of being, which Is accessible. The question is how to deal with all of the abstract seperation that our time in history has brought us to. What are the modus operandi for dealing with all of the shit that seperates us from life? How can we see it and talk about it so that it doesn't interfere with our journey but rather helps us in each moment to reconnect and reinvent?

R